Tuesday, March 17, 2015

FOX Should Give Up Their Futile Attempts at Making the Fantastic Four Work

 Marvel comics recently announced the cessation of the Fantastic Four comic series. The characters still exist within the grander Marvel Universe (616 and others), however they will no longer headline their own series. This is part of Marvel’s plan to cut off or at least shave down their noses a bit to spite the last remaining film properties not in-house.

With the absorption of Sony’s future Spider-Man films under the Marvel cinematic licensing world, only FOX’s X-Men (and therefor the coming Deadpool movie/franchise) and Fantastic Four franchises remain out of their control. As part of the announcement, Marvel has also ceased new character creation for the X-Men titles (let FOX do their own work) and announced they’d be “killing off” the seemingly immortal Deadpool.[1]

This doesn’t actually impact FOX’s Fantastic Four reboot all that much. Partly, this new film appears to diverge heavily from accepted canon, favoring a liberal adaptation of Marvel’s “Ultimate” universe origin story for the FF, where they’re trying to go dimension-hopping rather than experience an accident in space.


That being said, the Reed/Sue relationship in the comics is mere inches from copying their “Venture Bros.” parody. Ben and Johnny are played out tropes assuming both are currently still alive.[2] Franklin Richards is goddam omnipotent so they right him out of the story as much as possible, yet they can’t actually get rid of him as Marvel is wary of complete retcons as opposed to alternate universes crossing over.[3]

Reed Richards, Bruce Banner, and Tony Stark meanwhile are constantly battling it out for the title of “Smartest Douchebag to the Point of Possibly Being Autistic.” This leaves Sue as the only normal person in the series, making for some fantastically awful plot points, what with her being all reasonable and empathetic.

“REED STOP THIS BEFORE IT GOES TOO FAR.”

“REED THIS HAS GONE TOO FAR.”

“REED, I HAVE FINALLY SUCCUMBED TO NAMOR’S FRAT-LEVEL PERSISTENT ADVANCES BECAUSE YOU WENT TO FAAAAR.”

“REED, SERIOUSLY, MY ONLY CHARACTER TRAITS ARE IN RELATION TO YOU GOING TOO FAR. CAN YOU DIAL IT BACK A LITTLE, PLEASE? I THINK I MIGHT BE MAKING MY MEDICATIONS INVISIBLE.”

The Fantastic Four are the last vestiges of the Golden Age of science fiction. They went into space on a rocket ship, a handsome, condescending, white genius, his lovable meathead friend and pilot, his girlfriend for some reason, and for some other reason her kid brother. Then OOPS COSMIC RAYS and they have powers. That’s why the movies suck: the team only has one story and it’s their origin. There’s not a lot of character development to support a franchise.[4]

So maybe Marvel’s decision to stop developing plots for Deadpool and new characters for the X-teams is a little smart. By incorporating those characters into other titles to which FOX does not own the film rights, it keeps Marvel from feeding their own competition. The FF decision? It’s moot at best. FOX has already backed away from retelling the same story for the umpteenth time, siphoning a completely different iteration of the characters for their latest attempts at revitalizing a now twice-dead movie franchise. At the same time, Reed Richards has only been relevant in recent years as a member of the Illuminati cabal of super heroes within the Marvel universe. That stand-alone title was most decidedly not as profitable as others. Even if it’s only replaced by a rotating assortment of miniseries, popular side and fad characters could churn out a lot more revenue than an ongoing FF title.[5]

So should FOX just give up now that they’ve effectively created an entity entirely removed from Marvel?[6] Well, yes. They’re never going to get the mega franchise they want, and they already have the X-Men. Two X-men, even. Including the stand-alone Wolverine flicks, Apocalypse, and Deadpool, ten movies isn’t something to sneeze at. If FOX abandoned the Fantastic Four they could concentrate on more X-universe films like their long-rumored Mystique or Gambit solo projects.

So should Fox just give the FF back to Marvel? Hell no. Marvel … I honestly don’t think they want FF back. They might be glad to get the Skrulls back for a Kree/Skrull war plot line somewhere down the road, but there frankly isn’t anything a single ember of the Four can provide character-wise that hasn’t already been established in another Cinematic Universe Avenger.[7]

Truthfully, the Fantastic Four just aren’t that relevant today. They’re tired tropes painted on bland characters from a bygone age that is bygone because it evolved into something newer and more complex. I made an Iron Man joke yesterday. The last time I referenced the Four was probably in reference to Ben Grimm as one of the few confirmed Jewish superheroes.

Oh, except there was a synagogue and a rabbi in Captain America so … not really needing to bring Ben into canon any time soon.





[1] Currently, Wolverine is dead as well. And Jean Grey. And no fan ever really believes that anyway.
[2] Seriously, everyone in Marvel is a Lazarus. I lost track of Johnny.
[3] As a result, the “regular” Universe 616 is increasingly weird, filled with the best characters from lesser dimensions.
[4] Even the robot-free cartoon in the ‘90s relied heavily on Doctor Doom’s one-offs and Silver Surfer/Galactus plots, since the team didn’t have the depth to support a villain-of-the-week style.
[5] Spider-Gwen, Miles Morales in 616, movie tie-ins, even if short-lived each would become more cost effective than shoehorning new stories into tired characters.
[6] I wouldn’t be surprised if this forthcoming FF film lacks a Stan Lee cameo.
[7] Maybe they could have Galactus or his herald cameo in Guardians of the Galaxy at some point.

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